A Familiar Foe

I wanted to quit.

Well…not truly, but that thought popped into my head more than once over the last few weeks.

Have you ever had that escalated, stress-filled, I’ve-had-all-I-can-take moment that caused you to think maybe you were ready to throw in the towel? Maybe it was as a business owner or as an employee. Maybe in a friendship, in your marriage or even as a parent. If I’m honest, I could probably check all of those boxes at some point in my life.

I’ve had a lot going on in my primary business. Recently, I made a good and necessary back-office change that took months of long hours to prepare. And since the change, I’ve worked more 12-hour days than I can count. I’m sure you’ve had a season like that. Maybe you are in that season now!

The thought of “quitting” isn’t normal for me. I tend to be very self-motivated and driven toward the things God gives me vision for. I love the work that I do, and I am deeply committed to the clients that I am privileged to serve. My work usually brings me joy and a lot of satisfaction.

So, this moment caught my attention.

As I reflected on how my brain even got to a place where the word “quit” came to mind, I realized that a familiar foe had reared its ugly head.

Perfectionism.

Perhaps it’s familiar to you too.

Perfectionism constantly whispers (or shouts), “It’s not good enough!”

Perfectionism is absolutely fixated on a particular outcome. There is no room for the messiness of the process. Perfectionism can never be satisfied. It will always demand more. Our diligence — even our very best efforts — won’t ever be enough.

I find that I fall prey to perfectionism in seasons where I am:

• Tired
• Frustrated with my limitations
• Trying to learn new things
• Neglecting self-care (like not physically moving or taking time to reflect)
• Forgetting my true identity as a child of God (fully redeemed and perfectly loved)

Once I recognized what I was dealing with, I knew from experience what was needed.

I needed a mind and heart shift — a focus on excellence, not perfectionism.

Excellence is in direct contrast to perfectionism.

Excellence desires the best result possible, but it also accepts and celebrates that I have put forth my best effort.

Excellence understands that there is always a process of learning before we get to a desired outcome. It sees value in the process. It celebrates the journey. It allows for rest when needed. It is full of grace while still spurring us on to persevere.

It never drives us to give up or quit.

Today, if you are in a season where, like me, you’ve had a moment (or many) of wanting to just give up or quit, I hope that you find encouragement in my words.

God sees your efforts. He knows how much you care, how hard you are trying and how much you want to do well. He holds grace for you. He offers rest for your weariness. He promises peace over endless striving.

He is a God of excellence, not perfectionism.